Mary Lou Vitale Cohen

As she was there for us all, she be there watching us day by day. We will miss her but carry her with us. She might not be here but she is not gone. Her spirit will carry on. But one thing I do know is that she would want us to live life to fullest,love and be loved. She is definitly unforgetable.

Eulogy-March 6, 2007 It’s an honor and a privilege to be here today celebrating Mary Lou Cohen’s life. For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Robert Vitale Jr., Mary Lou’s nephew. As you well know, Mary Lou was the loving matriarch of the Vitale/Mineo clan. That maternal strength was given across generations; as a devoted daughter, wife, mother, grandmother, God-mother, sister, sister-in-law, aunt, cousin, great-aunt and friend. Mary Lou was a precious gift and a blessing. Mary Lou was the oldest of 6 children. With 5 younger, shall we say, spirited brothers, she quickly learned that she would have to keep them in line. She was always there for them, no matter what and they in turn were there for her. As with all traditional Italian families, fathers didn’t like anyone who tried to date their daughter. Mary Lou was known as the -queen- by her father; A nickname that her brothers teased her about often. Nevertheless, they understood their father’s expectation-to protect their only sister. Whenever she went out on a date, the rule was she had to take one of her brothers with her. Freddy, nine years her junior was often chosen to be the chaperone. While growing up, she always stuck up for her brother Nicky. He had a talent for getting into a little too much mischief. One day in particular he ended up taking the blame for his sister’s actions. Every week, Mary Lou took Nicky for dance lessons. One day, she made other plans. Unbeknownst to Nick, she decided to run away to get married. Nicky caught hell from his father for letting her get away. Mary Lou’s oldest brother Sonny loved when she came to watch him play drums in his band when they were teenagers. Being the two oldest they often hung out together. Mary Lou’s youngest brother, Tony spent a lot of time with Mary Lou growing up. One year on a vacation trip to Lake George, with their good friends The Ferraro’s, the adults planned a night out. The plan was to put the kids to bed early and head out to party. But 6 yr old Tony wasn’t tired at all. He wanted to party too. So, from the bungalow porch, he pitifully yelled, -Mary Lou!! Mary Lou!!- until she came back. He thought for sure she’d cave and take him with her. But there was no partying for little Tony that night-she put his butt back into bed. This past January, Mary Lou stayed with her brother Bobby and sister-in-law Mary. Mary Lou had a hard time sleeping so they stayed up late having -pajama parties-. They sat around the table talking, and laughing until all hours of the night. She often played referee to the bickering Bobby and Mary. Ironically, Mary Lou always sat at the head of the table, the seat that only Bobby occupied. What’s more surprising is that he didn’t say a word, he just took another seat. For his sister, he’d give up anything. Aunt Mary Lou and I shared a very special relationship that was extraordinary. Not only was she my aunt, she was one of the people responsible for raising me. My father, brother and I lived at 351 Paradise Avenue with Aunt Mary Lou, Uncle Moe and Mark most of my childhood. Just downstairs from us were my Aunt Jean and my cousins, John, Steven, Teresa, and Stanley. Aunt Mary Lou was the closest thing I had to a mother for many years. Summers were spent at Lake Zoar. It was an endless party with music and laughter from the last day of school through Labor Day. We water-skied from morning til night. Uncle Moe often got yelled at for driving the boat too fast. We didn’t care, the faster the better. There were parades of people rotating in and out of the cottage all summer long. As we got older she always welcomed our friends. One time, Mark pulled six of us skiing on the boat. Aunt Mary Lou was on the beach worrying that someone would get hurt but was in awe by the fact we actually did it without killing ourselves. Christmas vacations were spent at a farm-house in Vermont with several other families. We skied and snow-mobiled until we couldn’t feel our toes. Again, Uncle Moe got yelled at for driving the snow-mobiles too fast. Aunt Mary Lou was an accomplished skier herself. She often brought me and some of my cousins to Southington to ski during the winter. Mary Lou spent her entire life taking care of other people. She was the very essence of compassion, of duty, and a symbol of selfless humanity. She opened her heart and her home to all who needed her. Aunt Mary Lou’s compassion and love knew no boundaries. She never gave up on people even when others did. No matter how much trouble we got into, and boy we got into some doozies, she always believed you deserved a second chance- and a third – and a fourth. She believed in the goodness inside of us and hoped we would overcome our short-comings. She spent her life molding us into respectable, loving people with strong family values. She was proud that many of us went on to begin families of our own with those same family values. She picked up countless lost souls in their time of need. And she did it all so quietly, without ever calling attention to herself, never expecting anything in return. And Uncle Moe was there by her side every step of the way. I believe Uncle Moe was that extra reservoir of strength she drew upon when times were tough. Mary Lou had an unfailing sense of service and duty. It was a commitment nourished by her Catholic faith. A faith that told her, as it tells us all that, even the Son of God came into the world as a servant, not as a master. Her spirit was strong; her beliefs even stronger. It’s fitting that we’re in this church celebrating her life today. For it’s in this church she devoted so much of herself. She was a senior member of the Lady’s Guild for many years. She worked tirelessly serving God in the best way she knew how. We came with her to church every Sunday and when we were old enough we served as alter boys. She and Uncle Moe renewed their wedding vows here on their 50th wedding anniversary. Mary Lou watched lovingly as her only son was married here. She participated in countless numbers of weddings, confirmations, communions and baptisms. She became a God-mother here to many children; most recently to John Vitale Jr., her great-nephew. John Jr. and his sister Samantha wrote these words about their beloved Aunt Mary Lou: She was a good person and always thought about others She helped everyone She was funny She played monopoly with me and loved to watch movies with us She was the best aunt in the whole world I love her very much and she loves me too She did everything for me and Samantha She helped me with my homework She was the best Godmother I would rather have her here than be up in heaven I love her very much and I still do and always will. Mary Lou was a child at heart. She loved Mickey Mouse and everything Disney. She had collection after collection of Disney memorabilia and precious moment figurines. Most recently she acquired affection for a crazy dancing penguin named Mumble from the movie Happy Feet. She loved to laugh. Her big, beautiful, blue eyes sparkled with every smile. She had such a great sense of humor. Aunt Mary Lou was very proud of her family. Her grandchildren Preston and Tyler – you were the apple of your grandmother’s eyes. It was a love that can never be measured. If you multiply the highest number you can think of by infinity, you’d still never come close to knowing how much love she had for you and your dad. Always cherish your memories with your grandparents. They will stay with you your entire life. When you least expect it, you will hear their voices in your head guiding you in good times and in bad. Mark, her only son, you were truly your mother’s pride and joy. In the last 18 months, you faced the pain of losing both your parents head-on. A fate none of us would ever imagine or ever be prepared to handle. Yet you were the pillar of strength and proved once again that you are Mary Lou and Moe’s beloved son. They were so very proud of you and your compassion for others. You possess all of the same wonderful qualities of your parents. Know that you will never be alone. Your family is here to pick you up just like your parents did for all of us. Thank you for sharing your parents with us. Aunt Mary Lou today is our chance to say thank you for the way you brightened and enriched our lives. Even though God took you home, where you belong, we still feel cheated that you were taken from us. Yet we are so very grateful that you came along at all. It’s now that we truly appreciate what you’ve done for all of us. We know that life without you will be very, very difficult. You were the glue that held us all together. You were the spirit that guided us through storms and your unconditional love will blanket us all until we meet again in heaven. I can see Uncle Moe waiting for you with his out-stretched arms at the pearly gates with that big “cheshire-cat” grin on his face. Together you can go hand in hand to the Disney World in the sky. Rest in peace, Aunt Mary Lou, your work here is done. The rest is up to us. We will cherish our memories of you forever.

i just want to give my condolences to her family and friends……..she will defintely be missed

I wonder as I wander Out under the sky Why do people I care about Always have to die? Are you happy where you are Wherever that may be I wonder as I wander Do you still think of me is it nice up there in heaven for I know you made it there Are the clouds made of marshmallows Do you still know I care I look up under the winter sky And shed a single tear I think of all the days gone by I’ll always hold you dear I wonder as I wander out under the sky Why do people I care about Always have to die… This poem was found in a book and I liked it very much! Love and Miss

Mark Preston, and Tyler i share my deepest condolences to you and the rest of the family. Aunt Mary Lou was the heart of the family and kept us all together when she was here and we will continue to keep this family togethr in the rememberace of her. we love you so much and will always keep you and lesson you have tought us all in our heart. you may be gone but never forgotton. love nettie<3 <3 <3 xoxoxoxoxoxo

Mark, Our thoughts and prayers are with you. May you know of no more sorrow. Please take care of yourself, now for your sons and yourself. Love – Heidi, Beth, and Family.

Mark, Preston and Tyler, You are in our hearts and prayers. Auntie Marylou was a beacon of strength for us all. May we now take what she has taught us and live life to the fullest.

Mary Lou and I have been friends since junior high school. She never changed over the years, always loving and caring for her family and friends. She will be deeply missed by all whose lives she touched. She earned her place in Heaven. Gone but not forgotten. My deepest sympathy to her extended family.

My deepest sympathy at this difficult time… I love you.

Our thoughts and prayers are with MaryLou’s family and friends. She will be missed by everyone who had the pleasure of knowing her. Melissa Saville, Paul Pontillo, Frank Atanacio & the Staff of the Concord Group, and the Savin Rock Condominium Board & community.

The Miracle of Frendship There’s a miracle called friendship That dwells within the heart. And you don’t know how it happens Or when it got its start. But the happiness it brings you Always gives a special lift. And you realize that friendship Is God’s precious gift. (author unknown) M ary Lou a treasure to be cherished, A gift from Our Father above; R eaching out and touching us with unconditional love. Y ou filled our lives with laughter, beauity,joy,and grace. L eaving footprints on our hearts. O h! that never can be replaced. U nselfish, loving,a true, dear friend, we’ll always love you. Untill we all walk together in our heavenly home, Love forever, Connie and Alex Ferraro

We remember MaryLou as a thoughtful and caring person. She was always there when needed and gave 1000 percent of herself to family and friends. We will miss her.

With deepest sympathy. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

You are in my prayers and heart. My deepest sympathy goes to the family. Love always Missy